This morning I woke up. 6am. I always get up around 6am, even when I don’t have to work.
I always lie there for a minute and get a feel for my surroundings. My body check of the morning reports a heart beating and for a minute I wonder if its beating TOO hard…and off I go.
I start to bubble with a hint of anxiety as I remind myself that the ONLY time my blood pressure is an issue is when I give myself an anxiety or panic attack.
I always want to wake up and be cured. No more fretting and no more chaos. Every morning I open my eyes and….start to bubble.
It’s not a bubble about a specific thing rather a large collection I’ve put together over the last few months.
It started and is aggravated by my work and the people that are in positions of power. Well, semi-power.
Now its just a free for all.
I can’t get irritated or have a disagreement because it sets of anxiety, panic and heart thumps, which sets off more of all of the same.
If something startles me, same reaction. It’s really quite annoying.
So I get up, shower, lay back down and get centered. I get up, get dressed, lay back down and get centered. I do everything in stages until it comes time I’m not able to lay back down and I’m forced to leave.
It doesn’t stop there because I do it at work as well. I do a job, return to my office and sit down. Get centered, get up, do a job and repeat.
It’s annoying. What ever happened to just going about your day?!