You begin living your life. You start to settle in. You begin to breathe again when someone brings “them” up….
Your former bosses who tormented you and we’re the catalyst for your needed recovery.
You try to be polite and diplomatic and then they tell you things that have been said about you, your departure or things that were done you were kit aware if while employed in their regime.
The room shifts and you’re set back to zero.
I don’t engage in bashing…as much as I would love to. I try to take the high road and say things like “Well, just remember there are two sides to every story…”
I would love to let them know the truth behind the lies but its a no win situation if I do that.
It riles me up and makes me feel bad all over again.
I return to zero in my recovery from the PTSD Senior, Director, old boss and minion caused and it makes me angry. Also a sign I am at day zero.
My goal is to rise above them, their ignorance and conceit. To recover and do better than I could have ever done under their reign of terror.
I’m not a hateful person by nature but I do fight the urge to wish ill will on them. I let it go knowing God will take care of any things He sees as poor behavior or unethical. I rely on Him to judge and address them. It’s not my place but I am human and do need to fight the natural instincts to wish against them.
In the grand scheme of things they each are less than nothing and when I remember that, they disappear back to the past where they’ve placed themselves.
It’s a work in progress and I pray God allows me the ability to have a conversation where they may be brought up and dismiss it as quickly as their “importance” was dismissed the moment I left them.
Some people belong in the past for a reason – they’re not worthy of a moment of your present or future. Let them fade to the distance where less than nothing moments belong.